What we fear doing the most, is usually what we need to do.

I kno I kno, perspectives, blah blah blah....

My own insecurity, nonetheless,

it has affected me tremendously.

Whether it’s from years of solitude,

existing underlying issues,

or stemmed from an unconscious root

of regret, I may never know.

It is becoming easier to understand thru

tremendous self assessment and self evaluations.

My greatest energies come within the hours of 3 a.m.-8a.m....

I only sleep in small intervals, given I even catch a very small

5-10min. window of opportunity.

Having learned just those things has helped my progression and adaptation profusely.

It is proving to be more beneficial putting my energy and focus towards how I am going to be capable of such a change, alter this notion of existence that I’ve fallen into, as opposed to setting out in search of a why I’ve remained so sheltered and confined.

Mental Health issues are real, and lie within myself, & my mind.

My "being" is wired different. I have fought so called diagnosis & formalities of what has been blueprinted for such illnesses/issues for so long that there are days that I am not to sure if it has helped or made it worse.

I've never been too open about my mental status, and or issues within it.

My point in this post isn’t a cry for help, but simply a gesture of selflessness in the aspect that someone may read this who could be struggling just as I am, and it may fuel them with enough courage and willpower to open up about their problems and or issues, evaluate their scenario, make an attempt to find that reasoning of pulling together, or just simply finding those reasons to smile

It has tremedous effect!

I am not cured, prolly never will be, there is no overnight FIX, but I’ve grown into knowing enough about myself to realize I am an “Empath” which has been a huge mental factor considering I’ve never understood it.

I feel and take on other people’s reactions, emotions, energy, etc. and it wasn’t until I really honed in on that trait, that it has helped me in so many ways within reverse engineering some of my daily struggles...

Right down to smiling

To be Continued…